TAKING IT EASY IN THE PROGRAM

Rickicism No. 8

Some of us arrive at our Program and soon develop a fired-up frame of mind, determined to do well, but expecting miracles overnight. OA Longtimers know that it is probably not going to happen quite that way. Logic will tell you that it took some very poor self management of effort, resources and time to get ourselves to the point where we desperately needed the Program, having already exhausted all the fast fixes out there with which we had been bombarded on a daily basis, with ultimately depressingly negative results.

The Decision Has Already Been Made

I use to think that from day one, I had Step one licked. I knew for sure I was powerless over food. I thought, “Are you kidding?” The evidence is all over the place, the sweet-seeking and binging on recreational sugar, the compulsion to eat more once I start and the constant overeating at meals, taking comfort in the repetition of fork to mouth and that all too familiar feeling of being stuffed to the point of physical pain. For sure, my life was unmanageable. No doubt. 

“Participate or Isolate…That is the Question”

Just as Hamlet contemplated his existence with the question “To be, or not to be” in the famous Shakespearian soliloquy, we overeaters must contemplate our disease with a similar thought, to participate or to isolate.

There Is No Wave

I really want to eat something that tastes good right now. I am opening up kitchen cabinets in a frantic search for something, anything to put in my mouth to distract me from the crazy uncomfortable feelings. 

The urgency to compulsively overeat feels like a swelling wave coming to drown me. The only thing that can save me from certain doom is to take a giant breath and dive under, aka taking that first bite. I want to dive under. I have to dive under or I am going to drown. 

What I Learned at the 62nd OA Birthday Party

Attending the 62nd OA Birthday Party felt like a spiritual supercharge, a re-vitalizing way to start off the new year. The meetings were held via Zoom for safety reasons, of course. Admittedly, zooming the entire weekend for a total of 25 hours was exhausting, but it was doable with breaks and in the end was totally worth it. [Aside: I had the fortunate pleasure of attending my first OA Birthday party in 2020, in person, oblivious to how much the world would change just 2 months later.]

Step Two

Step Two- “Came to believe that a Power greater than ourselves could restore us to sanity.” 

Recently I was asked to share on Step Two. Not my favorite step, it’s the one I sprint by on the way to Step Three, the really exciting one. So I had to take another look at it. 

Perseverance: The Principle of Step 10

I link the number of each month to a Step. Then that’s the Step I focus on for the whole month. So, this month, October, is my Step 10 month. I read the Step in both the AA and OA 12 & 12 and ponder the relevant principle.