The Foothill Intergroup has several writing meetings that include a timed period of writing in response to a theme or selections from AA or OA approved literature. Below is one fellow’s response to a selection from AA’s “Twelve Steps and Twelve Traditions”. It was written during a telephone meeting and later adapted for the Footnotes blog. -Eds.
“Learning daily to spot, admit, and correct these flaws is the essence of character-building and good living. An honest regret for harms done, a genuine gratitude for blessings received, and a willingness to try for better things tomorrow will be the permanent assets we shall seek.
Having so considered our day, not omitting to take due note of things well done, and having searched our hearts with neither fear nor favor, we can truly thank God for the blessings we have received and sleep in good conscience.”
The Twelve Steps & Twelve Traditions © 1952, 1953, 1981 Alcoholics Anonymous World Services, Inc.
This past week I was possibly exposed to the coronavirus by a friend. I mention it because of the remarkable effects it had on my spiritual life and communication with God.
I was furious this person failed to mention during our fifteen minute conversation their belief that they had the coronavirus. I was in my car wearing a mask and sunglasses, they were on the sidewalk six to eight feet away. Their call to the doctor’s office fell on deaf ears – as the doctor had no test or wish to see them. They were told to simply “isolate and call if symptoms become worse.”
I was Angry, Sad, Afraid, Scared, Panicked, full of Rage - you name the negative emotion I felt after my conversation with this friend. Afterwards, I was on my knees, so to speak, reading and praying and asking fellows to pray for me, too. A calmness came over my spirit and trust that God was ultimately knowledgeable and in control.
I took many steps to gather more information regarding coronavirus and continued to offer many prayers surrounding this anger regarding the encounter and knee jerk response, “this person needs to get tested NOW!” I understood at a deeper level how ‘not in control’ I really am. I can’t control an invisible virus and I can’t force my friend to apologize or get an antibody test. I did ask and “No” was the response “I don’t think I need it.”
At night I lie in bed and surrender any lingering feelings regarding my friend, coronavirus in general, my personal attempts to try and control, confront, manipulate and demand and instead allow space for God to work God’s amazing plan for my life and other’s lives. Feeling grateful I am not the person in charge, one day at a time!
by S.
