When I was deep into the disease of compulsive overeating, I rarely felt physical hunger. Since I was eating in excess all the time I never gave my body the chance to be hungry. On the rare occasion that I did feel physical hunger— things got ugly quickly. That uncomfortable gurgling in my belly triggered panic in my head that the world was ending. As the hunger pangs worsened I became irritable, moody and discontent. I could count on this without fail. Physical hunger ruled me.
A sponsor suggested a solution that worked like gangbusters. Always keep small snacks on hand so you never get too hungry. This was a revelation to me— one, that another compulsive overeater felt the same way and two, that it was okay to plan for this and see that my needs were met. Mind blown. From then on I kept a small packet of almonds or protein bar in my glove compartment and my purse at all times.
This solution worked for me for years and I thought it was the best I could hope for. But, today after 22 months of abstinence, working the steps, taking direction and relying on my Higher Power, I don’t need to keep those snacks waiting in the wings as insurance against physical discomfort. For the first time in my life, I can sit with those feelings and know I’ll be alright. When I feel the pangs, I pause and ask my higher power to remove them. Those feelings eventually go away. I am not terrified of being hungry today because I have a HP that works, if I just remember to ask.
-Anonymous
